Book Review: The Friend by Sigrid Nunez — A Quiet, Profound Meditation on Loss and Connection

Sigrid Nunez's novel "The Friend" is a quiet masterpiece that manages to be both intellectually riveting and emotionally resonant. Published in 2018 and winner of the National Book Award for Fiction, this slim novel packs remarkable depth into its restrained prose--captivating in its emotional honesty while offering profound insights into grief, friendship, and the healing power of unexpected (dog!) connections.

At the heart of The Friend is the story of an unnamed woman writer who inherits a Great Dane named Apollo after the suicide of her close friend and mentor. Living in a small New York apartment with a strict no-pets policy, she nevertheless takes in this enormous, grieving animal. What unfolds is a tender and unexpected companionship that transforms both lives.

Nunez’s prose is clear, precise, and quietly powerful. The narrator’s voice is intelligent yet approachable, vulnerable yet never sentimental. The portrayal of grief is honest and unflinching, capturing its non-linear, often messy progression. The evolving relationship between the narrator and Apollo becomes a poignant illustration of how comfort and connection often arrive from unexpected sources.

Throughout The Friend, Nunez creates a rich, layered dialogue with writers and thinkers from across centuries. References to Rilke, Chekhov, Virginia Woolf, and others are woven seamlessly into the narrator’s reflections, giving the novel the feeling of an ongoing intellectual conversation. These allusions deepen the emotional and philosophical weight of the story, inviting readers to consider how grief, creativity, and solitude have been contemplated by others throughout history.

Rather than isolating the protagonist’s sorrow, these literary touchstones place it within a broader human context. The narrator’s grappling with loss and artistic purpose becomes part of a timeless exploration of how writers respond to mortality and meaning. Nunez suggests that literature itself can serve as a companion in times of crisis, offering solace and the reassuring knowledge that others have wrestled with the same unanswerable questions. In this way, The Friend becomes more than a story of individual grief; it transforms into a meditation on the enduring relevance of the written word and the shared lineage of those who seek to make sense of life’s impermanence through language.

For dog owners and animal lovers, The Friend offers something especially profound. Apollo, the Great Dane at the center of the story, is far more than a narrative device—he is a fully realized presence in the novel, written with respect, depth, and authenticity. Nunez resists the easy temptation to anthropomorphize him. Apollo is not portrayed as a human in a dog’s body, nor is he reduced to a simple symbol of loyalty or healing. Instead, he exists as a creature with his own rhythms, instincts, grief, and needs.

What makes Apollo’s role so moving is the way he mirrors and responds to human emotion without language. Any dog owner who has experienced the quiet, intuitive companionship of a dog during difficult times will recognize the silent comfort he offers the narrator. He doesn't "fix" grief or fill the void left by loss. But he remains beside her, attentive and present, teaching lessons in acceptance, patience, and the healing power of routine care.

The novel captures the strange and beautiful dynamic between humans and dogs: a relationship built not on words but on trust, presence, and quiet understanding. The narrator’s reluctant caretaking evolves into profound connection, reminding readers that sometimes love and loyalty grow not from initial desire but from shared experience and showing up for one another, day after day.

There is also an honest portrayal of the challenges that come with owning a large, aging dog—particularly one who arrives in a household already strained by grief. Apollo’s sheer size, his fragility, his need for care, and his own mourning become part of the narrator’s burden, but also part of her recovery. The dog becomes a responsibility that grounds her when nothing else feels certain. In caring for him, she finds a reason to care for herself.

For readers who share their lives with dogs, The Friend will feel both familiar and deeply validating. It honors the silent, steadfast companionship that dogs provide—not as replacements for human connection, but as unique relationships that offer their own kind of wisdom and comfort. The book acknowledges what many dog owners know: sometimes, the quiet presence of a dog can reach places that human words cannot.

Exciting news for fans of literary adaptations and dog lovers alike: The Friend is being brought to the silver screen! The film, directed by Scott McGehee and David Siegel (known for their sensitive storytelling in What Maisie Knew), is currently in post-production and set for a limited theatrical release in March 2025, with a wider release in April.

Naomi Watts stars as the unnamed narrator, bringing her signature depth and emotional subtlety to the role of a grieving writer navigating unexpected companionship. Bill Murray plays Walter, the narrator’s late friend and mentor, appearing in flashback sequences that add richness to the story’s exploration of loss.

Dog lovers will be thrilled to know that the filmmakers have honored the essence of the novel by casting an actual Great Dane in the role of Apollo, rather than relying on CGI or visual effects. The dog’s presence on screen promises to capture the quiet, grounding companionship that is so central to the novel’s emotional impact.

Early festival screenings at Telluride and Toronto have received warm praise, with particular attention given to the chemistry between Watts and her canine co-star. There’s great curiosity about how McGehee and Siegel will translate Nunez’s introspective, fragmented narrative into a visual medium—whether they will preserve the contemplative tone or opt for a more linear structure.

For those who have yet to read The Friend, now is the perfect time to pick up the novel before its cinematic debut. And for readers who have already been touched by Nunez’s quietly profound story, the upcoming film offers a fresh way to experience its moving meditation on grief, writing, and the unexpected healing power of canine companionship.

If you're interested in a visual glimpse of the adaptation, here's the official trailer: